Okay, bento warriors, here’s your chance to show the lunchroom what you’re really made of! Step by step instructions for making skull-tastic sushi rolls from any old scraps of rice, omelet and seaweed you happen to have lying around the house! No need to painstakingly translate all that pesky Japanese – just make like aContinueContinue reading “Make Your Own Goth Sushi”
Category Archives: Food
Traditional KFC Christmas Dinner, Now With Seaweed!
Lines stretch around the block at every KFC in Tokyo on Christmas Eve, as household minions are dispatched to pick up the traditional holiday fare, but this year they have a choice between regular and seaweed flavor. Pass the biscuits and tofu, ma! • And if you’re looking for some fine escapist reading to curl upContinueContinue reading “Traditional KFC Christmas Dinner, Now With Seaweed!”
What’s Wrong With These Desserts…?
Luscious strawberries…succulent peaches…flaky pastry…fresh whipped cream…all topped off with…PARSLEY. Yes, the fluffy little herb that rocked the 1950s sits inexplicably atop this otherwise tasty-looking fruit tart, and the strangest thing is, this wasn’t a random garnish fail. How about a big bite of Mont Blanc desert-itude featuring candied chestnuts, chocolate, custard, cream…and PARSLEY? Or banana-cream-caramelContinueContinue reading “What’s Wrong With These Desserts…?”
Spooky Sushi
Vampire-maki. Bwahahaha, you’d better bite this sushi before it bites you! But if you think that’s the scariest food you might encounter this Halloween season, think again… Arachno-futomaki The Goth sushi of choice. Scream Roll. Photos from http://ameblo.jp/kururinzushi. •
Unnatural Fruits Of Japan
I must have spent too much time in Japan, because the last time I passed my local Super Expensive Fruit Store (where they always ask if you’d like your purchase gift wrapped!), I actually found myself wishing I’d been invited somewhere that would require a gift of produce that’s as pricey as a good bottleContinueContinue reading “Unnatural Fruits Of Japan”
Squicky Cow Parts Chowdown
Hey, are you ready to grill up some tasty fourth stomach of cow tonight? Or maybe you’d prefer first stomach? Let’s get one of each, to compare! Then for chasers, how about a nice plate of diaphragm? And…let’s see…it’s always so hard to decide between large intestine and small, especially when there are three kinds ofContinueContinue reading “Squicky Cow Parts Chowdown”
Deep-Fried Bacon On A Stick
So you know how people are always going on about how super healthy Japanese food is, and that’s why nobody is Japan gets heart attacks or is fat, etc. etc. bla bla bla? Well, put this in your pipe and smoke it! Deep. Fried. Bacon. On a stick. A Japanese friend suggested meeting at a kushiage restaurant, butContinueContinue reading “Deep-Fried Bacon On A Stick”
The King Tut of Lunchboxing
I didn’t think making a Japanese bento box could get any MORE labor intensive, but bless my tweezers and nail scissors, yesterday I saw The King Tut Bento. Feast your eyes on that pharaoh-sized nori-maki, plus a pair of hieroglyphic eye-rolls, suitable for sumo wrestler-size appetites! The hand-rolled works of art alone would require me toContinueContinue reading “The King Tut of Lunchboxing”
It Looks Like a Burrito. It Says It’s a Burrito. But…
Okay, even though it claims in English to be a HOT & DELICIOUS BURRITO, I should have known that anything resembling a slightly overgrown packet of saltine crackers was going to deliver nothing but disappointment. But in case I had any doubts, it says right there on the package in Japanese: Bolognese & cheese. Unclear-on-the-nationalityContinueContinue reading “It Looks Like a Burrito. It Says It’s a Burrito. But…”
Salad Pizza
Now that we’re deep into the dog days of summer, doesn’t the very idea of nomming down a hot slice heaped with stomach-bombing meats kind of make you shudder? Enter…the Salad Pizza! Sure to please the ever-dieting bikini wearers as well as the lone vegetarian throwing a wrench into the Friday night beer fest, thisContinueContinue reading “Salad Pizza”
Slightly Unclear On The Concept: Cookies & Creme Muffins
Isn’t the whole purpose of “cookies & creme” flavored snackables to allow us to deceive ourselves about just how many Oreos we’re pounding down, disguised as a more sophisticated food item? Not in Japan! Front and center, baby, with sugar on top! •
A Whole New Kind Of Fast Food
If you’ve got a need for speed when lunchtime rolls around, what could be faster than a couple of bullet train rice balls? And just so you don’t have to be up at 5:00 a.m. with your tweezers and nail scissors, this little bento-making set comes complete with a mold for the sticky rice andContinueContinue reading “A Whole New Kind Of Fast Food”
Please Tell Me That’s Not Banana Coffee
Oh noooo! It is! Chocolate banana coffee, to be exact, and it’s this month’s special at the Excelsior Cafe. In my humble opinion, those two flavors go together like mushrooms and whipped cream, but that’s not the worst part. The feature that really pushes this one into the category of foods you would only serveContinueContinue reading “Please Tell Me That’s Not Banana Coffee”
The Godzilla Of Pancakes
If you are what you eat, right now I’m a righteous tower of these tall boys. This “short stack” came topped with butter and kuromitsu (Okinawan black sugar syrup) and yes ma’am, I ate every single fluffmonster bite. It was so good, I had to return to Hoshino Coffee for an encore. The next time, IContinueContinue reading “The Godzilla Of Pancakes”
Lunchboxing Power Tools
Are the kids at school making fun of your progeny because the Pikachu rice ball you tried to make looked more like Godzilla? Did the teacher send home a note about not making lunch characters that scare the other children, when all you were tying to do was make that hot dog look like aContinueContinue reading “Lunchboxing Power Tools”
The Head Is The Best Part
Fishsicles. The head is the best part. Or so I was told by the ayu vendor at the Yasukuni shrine. My new pet fish-on-a-stick looked too big to be eaten whole, but apparently that’s exactly what you’re supposed to do. Head, tail, innards, bones, everything. My main grill man helpfully informed me that they’re skewered upside-down soContinueContinue reading “The Head Is The Best Part”
Would You Like Fries On That?
Your eyes do not deceive you: right there between the mustardy-mayo and the all-beef patty is a honkin’ deep-fried swadge of hash browns. In an attempt to challenge the Gurakoro for carb supremacy, this Idaho Burger sneaks in the equivalent of a side of fries, in addition to the side of fries. And see howContinueContinue reading “Would You Like Fries On That?”
Fish Bone Crackers
骨煎餅（ほねせんべい／hone senbei） Look! Look! They have fish bone crackers on the menu at this izakaya! I love fish bone crackers! What? Oh, haha, don’t you mean “fish bone” crackers? Uh, no. That would be fish bone “crackers.” Eww, does that mean what I think it means? Yeah, they’re made from real fish bones. Little fishieContinueContinue reading “Fish Bone Crackers”
From Sixteen Nearly-Extinct Barley Seeds…
Only in Japan would a guy bent on coming up with a new brewskie start by requesting sixteen seeds of a nearly annihilated strain of barley from the Department of Agricultural History, then spend years cultivating his little two-foot-square patch of grain into a crop big enough to malt for production! After-work company drinking partiesContinueContinue reading “From Sixteen Nearly-Extinct Barley Seeds…”
Oh Yay, It’s Deep-Fried Fish Testicle Season
Yep, that’s it: “Shirako Tempura,” front and center on the menu I was handed at the izakaya Friday night. (Or if you’re slimming, you can slurp them down raw for only ¥399, with little chopped veggies lurking on the side.) If you’re in Tokyo from Nov-Mar and are brave enough to try this delicacy, walk through theContinueContinue reading “Oh Yay, It’s Deep-Fried Fish Testicle Season”
Pizza of Christmas
Why not take a break from the typical Christmas feast of fried chicken* and order a festive pizza instead? This beauty from Pizza Hut delivers something for everyone on your list! Korean BBQ! Squid! Hot dogs! Bacon! Mayo! And in case you’ve got some die-hard traditionalists, note that Pizza Hut has wisely done a distributionContinueContinue reading “Pizza of Christmas”
The Carb-O-Load Burger
…and just so no addictive starchy food group is left out, it come with fries! Hey, what happens if you slap everybody’s favorite carb-o-rific side dishes together and sandwich them between an additionally carbo-o-loaded bun? Macaroni & cheese + shrimp croquette = McDonald’s Japan’s new Gurakoro Burger! The name comes from smushing together the words “gratin” (hereContinueContinue reading “The Carb-O-Load Burger”
The Leaves Are Nice, But It’s All About The Sticky Rice Balls
Yeah, yeah, I know – leaves glowing in autumnal splendor, fall evening clear and crisp, moon shining bright, pond like a mirror, and the photos are sure to wow the folks back home. But let’s go bottom line: it’s really all about the miso dango. I’ve waited ALL YEAR for the Rikugi-en garden in Komagome toContinueContinue reading “The Leaves Are Nice, But It’s All About The Sticky Rice Balls”
Cabbage and Ginger Pickle Pizza
What’s round and topped with cabbage, ginger pickles, bean sprouts, mayonnaise, otafuku sauce and dried fish shavings? Okonomiyaki pizza, of course! The beloved Osaka “omelet” is traditionally made with an eggy batter that includes shredded slimy yams, but Shakeys gives it a Western-style twist by piling all the ingredients onto a pizza crust instead. Pass theContinueContinue reading “Cabbage and Ginger Pickle Pizza”
Previously Undiscovered Cow Parts
It’s a cold autumn night and I’ve been outside for hours and suddenly I could eat an entire cow. Oh wow, look at this! YES PLEASE. Cheery little burner is lit, pile of awesome-looking stuff begins to melt down, mingling juices bubble merrily, and finally, finally, finally, servings are ladled out! Oh, no. Lurking underContinueContinue reading “Previously Undiscovered Cow Parts”
Standing Room Only…Restaurants?
Fried meat on a stick, SRO. Taking the single-guy-wolfing-down-a-microwaved-burrito-over-the-sink to new levels, check out these SRO restaurants! Not uncommon, especially near train stations, these places solve a major problem for harried Japanese citizens: how do you grab a bite when you’ve got 30 minutes from office to meeting and 20 of those are going toContinueContinue reading “Standing Room Only…Restaurants?”
Try Not To Think About The Sizzling Fish Brain
Maybe it’s because we’d just finished watching The Matrix, and the post-movie izakaya conversation is all about comparing the worldview of the Wachowski Bros to the Buddhist concept that all reality exists only in our minds, but when I see that someone has ordered these little silver fish, I know a “clear your mind ofContinueContinue reading “Try Not To Think About The Sizzling Fish Brain”
The Fish Bone Restaurant
You know how in America some serious steak restaurants have honkin’ big showcases of marbled beef displayed near the front door? Well, this is the equivalent come-hither to dine at a joint where himono is the specialty of the house! Himono is basically fish jerky, but it’s different from beef jerky because it features the addedContinueContinue reading “The Fish Bone Restaurant”
I Was Craving Something Black For Lunch…
And fortunately, Burger King did not disappoint! Behold the Kuro Burger, with a bun chock full o’ bamboo charcoal and ketchup made from squid ink! I was poised to snark, but…yes please, I think I’ll have another! •
Extreme Pancakes
In a “foreign food” breakthrough worthy of comparison to the In ‘n Out Double Double, behold the most recent craze in Japanese pancakes: super thick flapjacks! A miracle of batter engineering, these ultra-fluffmonsters are not only perfectly browned on both sides, they’re cooked all the way through with no surprise pockets of sogginess in theContinueContinue reading “Extreme Pancakes”
Seaweed Jello
Sadly, it didn’t have pineapple, fruit cocktail OR marshmallows in it. This square of wiggly was chock full of algae, algae, and more algae! Made from nori (the wrap on tuna tekkamaki at your favorite sushi bar), it was held together with just enough agar (the growth medium in petri dishes at your favorite laboratory)ContinueContinue reading “Seaweed Jello”
Mmm, Intestine Flavored Noodles
Standing in line this morning to buy food so I could make it through my three-hour Japanese class, I was casually browsing the shelves next to me in case something looked better than the melon bread in my hot little hand. At that hour of the morning, I’m usually still too brain dead to beContinueContinue reading “Mmm, Intestine Flavored Noodles”
Spaghetti Burger
Yesterday afternoon I was running around my neighborhood without lunch and too many errands to do, and suddenly I turned into a teenage boy. MUST. EAT. ONE MILLION CALORIES. NOW. Fortunately, the ever-handy MosBurger was close enough to stumble into, but as I was making for the finish line, I was brought to a screechingContinueContinue reading “Spaghetti Burger”
Curry Cheese Pizza Chips?! Nooooo!
Nevermind that putting cheese on top of Japanese curry sounds about as appealing as stirring a spoonful of peanut butter into my coffee, the idea of serving that flavor mashup on a pizza-flavored potato chip has me running for my stash of purloined air discomfort bags. And in case I want to make this aContinueContinue reading “Curry Cheese Pizza Chips?! Nooooo!”
Yes, It’s Exactly What It Looks Like
If you guessed squid guts, squid guts and squid guts, you win the trifecta! But very tasty ones, apparently, since they sell a mountain of these at the Hokkaido store in Sugamo. I’ve occasionally been faced with these at the Japanese restaurants called izakaya, where you’re served a small snack with your drink order whetherContinueContinue reading “Yes, It’s Exactly What It Looks Like”
Beer Slurpee
This summer in Tokyo the trending drink of choice is Frozen Draft Beer! The beer itself is chilled extra cold, then a head of beer slush is swirled on top from a repurposed Icee machine. On a steamy summer night, I have to admit, this fad did not disappoint! I pounded this one down atContinueContinue reading “Beer Slurpee”
Meat Donuts
Now you don’t have to wait for breakfast to chow down on deep-fried donut goodness. Thanks to the product development geniuses at Mister Donut, now you can have them for dinner! In fact, you can serve them two nights in a row without guilt, since they come in two colors! Although the black sesame varietyContinueContinue reading “Meat Donuts”
The Indo-Taco!
Out walking and far from home last weekend, I was struck by the sudden need to acquire about a thousand calories. Lucky for me, there was a Mos Burger conveniently located within staggering distance. The Japanese equivalent of McDonald’s, Mos Burger’s claim to fame is a burger topped with a sunny-side-up egg. (This is aContinueContinue reading “The Indo-Taco!”
Make Your Own Pikachu Lunchbox!
Want your kid to blow away the cafeteria crowd when they open up their Pokemon lunchbox tomorrow? Fill it with this outrageous labor of love! Your child might even be distracted enough to eat that big hunk of squash, fake crab legs and seaweed it’s made from. In twelve elaborate steps (from the pages ofContinueContinue reading “Make Your Own Pikachu Lunchbox!”
It’s Coffee Jello Season!
The first time I encountered little cubes of coffee jello in an ice cream parfait I thought ewww, weird! But then I became acquainted with Japanese summer weather, which sort of feels like being in a room where the shower has been running full blast on ‘maximum hot’ for an hour. A nice big dishContinueContinue reading “It’s Coffee Jello Season!”
Fruity Pizza
No your eyes do not deceive you: those are adorable – if un-pizza-like – miniature marshmallows joining the pineapple and kiwi goodness of this summer offering at the Shakey’s all-you-can-eat bar. Topped off with festive multicolored sprinkles, the “slightly acidic flavored sweetness” of this dessert pizza will definitely rustle your jimmies. •
Snacks With Tentacles
If you run out of Snacks With Eyes, break out the munchies that double as creepy things to sneak up on someone with the next time you’re watching Alien. Dried squid snacks are one of the most popular junk foods in Japan – I had a hard time choosing between the many varieties for sale atContinueContinue reading “Snacks With Tentacles”
Dubious “Foreign” Delicacy
I wonder why I’ve never encountered this avocado-chocolate combo at any Indonesian restaurant I’ve ever been to…? Hmm. Saw this today on the lunch menu at the “pan-Asian food” cafe in Inokashira Park. •
Pickle-flavored Pringles
Japanese consumers eat pickles by the gallon, but not THESE kind of pickles. Rating three splats on the Sour-O-Meter, Screamin’ Dill Pickle Pringles are the most mysterious flavor I’ve seen yet. I mean, last time I checked, sourness wasn’t the most prized attribute of potato chips. I can tell they’re not a locally developed product because theContinueContinue reading “Pickle-flavored Pringles”
Burger Pizza
What all-beef manhandler’s got lettuce, tomato, pickles and onions, all topped off with two kinds of cheese and a special sauce? Yes, it’s Burger Pizza! The all-you-can-eat lunch buffet at the Shakeys in Takadanobaba is featuring this fast food mash-up as their summer special. Pass the Ketchup Gun! •
Weapons For The Lunchbox Arms Race
Aieeee! Is the mom who made this Anpan Man lunch a graduate of the Harvard School Of Lunchmaking? No, but she knows that in the bentō box cuteness wars, you have to stay on top of the latest technology! Today at the Shibuya Loft store I discovered a few of the secret weapons Japanese moms use to turnContinueContinue reading “Weapons For The Lunchbox Arms Race”
Snacks With Eyes
Forget the pretzels and potato chips next time you slouch onto your sofa to watch the big game – why not pound down a snack that stares right back at you? This bag of Almond Fishes promises all the crunchy goodness of sight-challenged munchies, plus a righteous dose of calcium. And it’s all-natural! The calciumContinueContinue reading “Snacks With Eyes”
Fish Egg Mayo Pizza Chips
Can’t decide whether to go for pizza or sushi? Now you don’t have to, thanks to this revolutionary new potato chip flavor from Calbee. It’s bursting with the goodness of cod roe, mayonnaise, seaweed, cheddar and swiss cheese! But there’s more! On the back, there’s a special offer! I was extremely disappointed to discover IContinueContinue reading “Fish Egg Mayo Pizza Chips”
Anime Lunchboxing
“Kiki’s Delivery Service” never dropped a lunchbox like this on my kindergarten picnic table! Yikes! No Face stares hungrily up at the unsuspecting child who just opened his lunchbox… There’s even a makkuro kurosuke seaweed-covered rice ball (staring up with little nori eyes off to the right), from “Totoro!” Ordinary Japanese moms were undoubtedly up before dawnContinueContinue reading “Anime Lunchboxing”
Hot Dog Pizza
And you thought pizza couldn’t be improved as the perfect junk food! In honor of spring, Pizza-LA comes through with the Buttered Potato & Sausage Pizza In addition to that ring of delightful little hot dogs, it’s got corn, tomatoes, potatoes, onions, and bacon, all topped off with that oh-so-Italian favorite, lemon butter sauce. AlsoContinueContinue reading “Hot Dog Pizza”
Only In Japan 