Intellectual Animal Beauty Masks
By now you probably thought you’d seen it all when it comes to Japanese facial sheet masks – from the squicky & scary to skin treatments that turn you into … Continue Reading Intellectual Animal Beauty Masks
Thanks For Destroying My Fantasies, Little Host Stickers
Okay, when I spotted this page of stickers at Tokyu Hands featuring smokin’ hot hostboys, I thought they were kinda fun. Even considered buying a bunch of them to give to my … Continue Reading Thanks For Destroying My Fantasies, Little Host Stickers
Top Ten Crazy Holiday Gifts From Japan 2016
Yes, it’s that time of year again, when you comb your list of friends & family for those who truly deserve that rare and awe-inspiring gift from Japan… 10. If there’s nobody on your … Continue Reading Top Ten Crazy Holiday Gifts From Japan 2016
Uncuddly Stuffies
If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, you know that my sympathy runs deep for the poor toy designers who have to churn out new adorable stuffies when all the … Continue Reading Uncuddly Stuffies
Essential Gear For The Corporate Warrior
Saw the red camo shoes at a shoe store in Skytree, and the samurai b-ball hats at Tokyu Hands in Ikebukuro • Read a novel set in Tokyo…
Give Yourself A Tooth Manicure
Want to perk up those pearly whites a bit, but don’t want to choose between paying for cosmetic dentistry and getting a new car? This Japanese tooth makeup is for you! For less … Continue Reading Give Yourself A Tooth Manicure
The Octopus Treatment…For Your Face
If you’re a little short on live octopus tentacles the next time you need a beauty treatment, Tokyu Hands will happily sell you this pink plastic Vacu & Lift Roller. I’m not … Continue Reading The Octopus Treatment…For Your Face
Looks Like Santa’s Been Skipping The Gym This Year
As you know, I take an avid and unnatural interest in Japanese holiday costumes, and this year is no exception. There were the usual acts of Santa blasphemy – including Sexy Santa, Emo … Continue Reading Looks Like Santa’s Been Skipping The Gym This Year
Ten Best Stocking Stuffers From Japan!
10. SUSHI SOCKS 9. DIY CROSS STITCH PHONE CASE 8. ANIMAL SKELETONS 7. DEVIL WAX 6. EYELID EXERCISER 5. EMOJI EYE MASK 4. DEODORANT CANDY 3. NINJA SNACK PICKS 2. THE STATUE OF TOO MUCH … Continue Reading Ten Best Stocking Stuffers From Japan!
More Christmas Hats From Hell
From the Tokyu Hands buyers who brought you the original Christmas Hats From Hell, behold the latest ways to say “Ho ho ho, suckers!” Available at Tokyu Hands in Shibuya, of course! If you’d like … Continue Reading More Christmas Hats From Hell
Top Ten Only In Japan Holiday Gifts 2014!
10. What do you give the person who has everything? They’ve already got a one-shot coffee maker. And a one-shot tea machine. But I bet they don’t have a ONE-SHOT … Continue Reading Top Ten Only In Japan Holiday Gifts 2014!
Wonder If They’ll All Be Named ‘Sonic’?
The newest pet craze to hit Tokyo: hedgehogs. For full enjoyment of your new pet, it would be best to adopt a schedule that includes all-night video gaming, as they are primarily nocturnal and … Continue Reading Wonder If They’ll All Be Named ‘Sonic’?
Hardcore Workout Equipment…For Your Face
Getting yourself a righteously small face has always been prized in Japan, but having a face that just oozes buffness is apparently the new Holy Grail Of Pulchritude. Behold the dizzying array of exercise … Continue Reading Hardcore Workout Equipment…For Your Face
Mother’s Little Eyedrop Helper
Ewww! Eyedrops! Get those things away from me no no no no no no you’re not putting something in my eye blink blink blink blink! Okay, I admit it, I’m … Continue Reading Mother’s Little Eyedrop Helper
Ear Floss
In the Solution Looking For A Problem sweepstakes, this has gotta be a contender. If your piercings are in desperate need of a roto-rootering, you can stock on up ear floss at … Continue Reading Ear Floss
Scary Kabuki Facial Mask
Somehow, Kabuki Villain Face never really whispered “adorable” in my ear, but it could be pretty entertaining to scare the bejeezus out of unsuspecting visitors while also attaining new levels of softer, smoother skin. And … Continue Reading Scary Kabuki Facial Mask
Moustaches I Would Regret
Or should I say scumstaches? What these wispy ghosts of fake beards/moustaches lack in identity concealment, they more than make up for in believability. Japanese men are not generally candidates for … Continue Reading Moustaches I Would Regret
Monsoon Season, Lock ‘n Load
It’s tsuyu season in Japan right now, which pretty much means all rain, all the time. (Not to be confused with typhoon season, which is all rain, RIGHT NOW.) Both seasons … Continue Reading Monsoon Season, Lock ‘n Load
But Will They Come When You Call?
Behold the latest pet craze to sweep Tokyo! Now you can have your very own jellyfish aquarium, complete with disco lights! You can pick up everything you need at (where … Continue Reading But Will They Come When You Call?
Salty Dragonblood Toothpaste
But what I want to know is, how do they KNOW the dragons only ate pesticide-free virgins? Is the blood harvested from organically-certified, knight-armor-free, farm-grown dragons? You can get your very own Toothpaste … Continue Reading Salty Dragonblood Toothpaste
Cherry Blossom Party Costumes I Would Regret
The cherry trees are readying their onslaught, and it’s almost time for the annual beer-fuelled frolicking to commence. What better way to say, “I am a wild and crazy guy” than … Continue Reading Cherry Blossom Party Costumes I Would Regret
Your Very Own Tiny Glowing Pile Of Plastic Firewood
When it comes to selling miniature replicas of burning logs, nobody can beat Tokyu Hands. Yes, this patented FireWood(TM) product will have you on the edge of your seat as … Continue Reading Your Very Own Tiny Glowing Pile Of Plastic Firewood
You May Call Me ‘Your Solar-Powered Highness’
For this week’s Wat-I-Don’t-Even Award, nothing beats this spectacularly useless figure of Her Royal Elizabeth-ness, which harnesses the mighty sun to power her royal wave. You may stock up on … Continue Reading You May Call Me ‘Your Solar-Powered Highness’
For Charcoal-Fresh Breath…
…get thee to the closest Tokyu Hands and get your paws on some Natamame toothpaste! It claims to smite your bad breath in four different flavors: Rose, Aloe (does aloe … Continue Reading For Charcoal-Fresh Breath…
Nose Training
I don’t know which is weirder, the idea that you’d want your nose to be bigger, or that you think you can “train” it into pulchritude by using one of … Continue Reading Nose Training
Hair Chalk
Suddenly the stores are full of this stuff! Hair chalk isn’t as bright as bleaching the snickers out of your tresses and then dyeing, but it’s perfect for the clubhussy … Continue Reading Hair Chalk
Hot Babe Leopard Rarrrr Of Sewing Machines
Get inspired to whip up a Goth-Vampire costume of killer drop-deadness by kitting out your Bernina with these wildass skins! Your plain vanilla sewing steed no longer has to pine … Continue Reading Hot Babe Leopard Rarrrr Of Sewing Machines
Wooden Origami
Craving a cherry crane or a pine penguin? Or maybe you’ve always wanted to fold a walnut helmet! Yep, this origami is actually made from paper-thin slices of wood! You … Continue Reading Wooden Origami
Rice Of Unbearable Cuteness
Although digging into this adorable bunny-shaped rice might be a bit like steeling yourself to whack the head off a Bambi piñata, who can resist making boring old curry into … Continue Reading Rice Of Unbearable Cuteness
Street Fightin’ Yakuza Action Figures
More than meets the eye! For hours of happy crime spree play, nothing can beat the thug rangers! Your platinum-haired chinpira will pinch Barbie’s car before she can squeal “math is … Continue Reading Street Fightin’ Yakuza Action Figures
31 Flavors Of…Toothpaste?
Now you can fight cavities and have curry-fresh breath too, with this new line of Breath Palette flavored toothpaste! With thirty-one strange flavors to choose from, your teeth can sparkle … Continue Reading 31 Flavors Of…Toothpaste?
Top Ten Only In Japan Holiday Gifts 2013
10. I bet the person on your list who has everything doesn’t have a THOUSAND DOLLAR RICE COOKER! 9. Surely you know someone whose garden wouldn’t be complete without a … Continue Reading Top Ten Only In Japan Holiday Gifts 2013
More Acts Of Santa Blasphemy
Yes, when it comes to taking license with the jolly old elf, nobody can beat Tokyu Hands! If you’d like to visit Tokyu Hands the next time you’re in Tokyo, directions … Continue Reading More Acts Of Santa Blasphemy
The Newest Ways To Get A Small Face
Who knew that aluminum could be the key to that holy grail of pulchritude, the small face? Apparently, it has become the flavor of the month when it comes to head … Continue Reading The Newest Ways To Get A Small Face
Hot Snood
Get yer red hot snoods right here at Tokyu Hands! I always thought a snood was a sort of hairnet thingie, but apparently here in Japan, it’s an electric fake … Continue Reading Hot Snood
“What May I Pick Up For You, Master Of The House?”
Now anyone can be All-Master-All-The-Time with these maid-themed chopsticks from Tokyu Hands! While they may not be too ace at drawing cat whiskers on your ome-rice, you can probably beat … Continue Reading “What May I Pick Up For You, Master Of The House?”
Personal Porta-Potty
For the Japanese travel fear that dare not speak its name, behold the PuruPuru Mini Toilet bag! A quick flip to the back side convinces the already-anxious traveler (especially the … Continue Reading Personal Porta-Potty
Mankiller Bubble Bath
Forget having a Miracle Body. All I gotta do to snag me a man is hop into one of these kickass bubble baths from Tokyu Hands. I saw these at … Continue Reading Mankiller Bubble Bath
Lunchboxing Power Tools
Are the kids at school making fun of your progeny because the Pikachu rice ball you tried to make looked more like Godzilla? Did the teacher send home a note … Continue Reading Lunchboxing Power Tools
The Miso Muddler And Other Obscure Kitchen Tools
I laughed when I saw that there was a special tool you could plunge into a tub of miso, twirl it around to get exactly one bowl’s worth of fermented … Continue Reading The Miso Muddler And Other Obscure Kitchen Tools
How To Get Yourself A Tall Nose
Making your nose look bigger is not at the top of most Westerners’ must-have beauty techniques, but stylish Japanese blades are apparently keen on giving their schnozzes a lift! From … Continue Reading How To Get Yourself A Tall Nose
For All Your Crossdressing Costume Needs
Now a guy no longer has to waste hours in front of the mirror, practicing lying to the cashier at Tokyu Hands that he’s buying that sparkly pink Power Ranger … Continue Reading For All Your Crossdressing Costume Needs
Top Ten Only In Japan Holiday Gifts 2012!
10. For the film maven on your list who camped overnight in line at the movie theatre to see the new Evangelion…ANIME EYES SLEEP MASKS (seen at Village Vanguard) 9. For … Continue Reading Top Ten Only In Japan Holiday Gifts 2012!
Emo Santa
“Deck the halls with boughs of hemlock, fu-fu-fu-fu-fu, fu, fu, fu, fu…” Do you find red to be just too unbearably cheery? Think “Jingle Bells” ought to be remixed as … Continue Reading Emo Santa
Scary Santa
You know how some kids are afraid to go sit on Santa’s lap, even if they really really really want a pony? Well, I bet all the Santa phobias in … Continue Reading Scary Santa
Costumes I Would Regret Even Thinking Of Wearing
What IS this? A rare species of face-eating nudibranch? A faded map of the 18th hole at Pebble Beach? No! It’s a fake five o’clock shadow! This is an especially … Continue Reading Costumes I Would Regret Even Thinking Of Wearing
Costumes I Would Regret, Part Deux
Nothing says Career Killer like a shot of your grinning face leering at the camera from inside a beer mask, two-fisting some brewskies! Tokyu Hands once again comes through with a … Continue Reading Costumes I Would Regret, Part Deux
Your Very Own Electronic Monk!
Tired of petitioning the Powers That Be every day for world peace, a winning lottery ticket, and for them to still have your size when those purple Fluevog boots you … Continue Reading Your Very Own Electronic Monk!
Because It Feels So Good When You Stop?
At first glance, it’s hard to imagine that bonking yourself on the head would make you feel better. I found “Mr. Energetic,” the quaint wooden hammer, in the self-massage section … Continue Reading Because It Feels So Good When You Stop?
Eyeball Massage
The do-it-yourself massage section at Tokyu Hands is just bursting with frightening inventions dedicated to helping you reach the kinks in every part of your body, but I had to … Continue Reading Eyeball Massage
