Jonelle Patrick's Only In Japan
Every day, stuff you'd never see anywhere else.
Links to the May-June 2021 Japanagram features Hello, friend! It’s me, Jonelle. Here are the features that Japanagram subscribers enjoyed in January… Click on photo or link to read • … Continue Reading Japanese wedding weirdness, how to live forever, and killer ginger-soy steak sauce
Links to the March-April 2021 Japanagram features Hello, friend! It’s me, Jonelle. Here are the features that Japanagram subscribers enjoyed in January… Click on photo or link to read • … Continue Reading Treasure rice, cherry blossoms at a northern castle, and Japanese ceremonies we didn’t know we needed
Links to the FEBRUARY 2021 Japanagram features Hello, friend! It’s me, Jonelle. Here are the features that Japanagram subscribers enjoyed in January… Click on photo or link to read • … Continue Reading 40,000 dolls dressed in Imperial court robes, Japanese chicken soup, & strange barbers of the pleasure quarter
Links to the DECEMBER 2020 Japanagram features Hello, friend! It’s me, Jonelle. I hope that the new year is bringing you all kinds of good changes and extra heapings of … Continue Reading The Japanese art of gift giving, millions of twinkling fairy lights, and hilarious Xmas weirdness
As we slide into fall, how are you doing? I hope you’re not in the path of any of the disasters that have been coming at us from all directions. … Continue Reading A town full of tricksters, strange Japanese beauty goals, and humble fall flowers that become spectacular in numbers
Are you still hanging in there, as we continue our wild ride through the Wonka tunnel and (hopefully soon!) pop out the other side? In a quest to make it … Continue Reading Surrounded by a waterfall, what to serve for Japanese dessert, and how to get the all-new, not-for-sale Yumi & Kenji short for free
If you’ve been puzzling over why Japan is such a “mask-wearing society,” it’s not because they’re all super-OCD about germs. Here are six excellent Japanese reasons to wear a mask … Continue Reading Six Surprising Reasons Japanese People Wear Masks, Even When There’s No Pandemic
We’re coming into high matsuri season, when the local Shinto gods are paraded through the neighborhood to remind them of all the people and businesses they’re supposed to be keeping … Continue Reading An Only-In-Japan Problem If There Ever Was One
By now you probably thought you’d seen it all when it comes to Japanese facial sheet masks – from the squicky & scary to skin treatments that turn you into … Continue Reading Intellectual Animal Beauty Masks
Not content to merely give people taller noses, smaller faces, and glued eyelids, now there’s a Japanese beauty appliance that irons out saggy face parts! Depending on which wrinkly bit … Continue Reading The Secret Facelift Belt
I scoured the drugstores at obscure Tokyo subway stops so you don’t have to. This face wash disappears off the shelves as fast as it’s put out, because who WOULDN’T want … Continue Reading Rose Foam Beauty Whip!
If Scary Nails was the theme of this year’s Nail Queen competition at the Tokyo Nail Expo, the winners definitely did not disappoint! And in the Junior Student category… Thanks go … Continue Reading Nail Queen…From Hell
If you’re a little short on live octopus tentacles the next time you need a beauty treatment, Tokyu Hands will happily sell you this pink plastic Vacu & Lift Roller. I’m not … Continue Reading The Octopus Treatment…For Your Face
In the eternal search for a beauty trend that their mothers dare not copy, young women in Japan are now trying to look…sickly. Yes, it’s gone beyond dyeing their hair gray to using makeup in … Continue Reading Sick Is The New Black
Whether you’re batting them at that cute guy from Accounting, or giving the stinkeye to your rival from Marketing, these Halloween-themed lashes will boost your superpowers 1000%. • Read a novel … Continue Reading Fake Eyelashes For The Halloween Win
Getting yourself a righteously small face has always been prized in Japan, but having a face that just oozes buffness is apparently the new Holy Grail Of Pulchritude. Behold the dizzying array of exercise … Continue Reading Hardcore Workout Equipment…For Your Face
In the Solution Looking For A Problem sweepstakes, this has gotta be a contender. If your piercings are in desperate need of a roto-rootering, you can stock on up ear floss at … Continue Reading Ear Floss
Or should I say scumstaches? What these wispy ghosts of fake beards/moustaches lack in identity concealment, they more than make up for in believability. Japanese men are not generally candidates for … Continue Reading Moustaches I Would Regret
Premium. Tomato. Whitening. Essence. Because if I wanted whiter skin, tomatoes are the first thing I’d think of. • Read a novel set in Tokyo…
If you don’t think it’s quite out there enough to have eyes that make you look like a living doll, say hello to this line of definitely unnatural contacts! How … Continue Reading Scary Eyes Made Easy
…get thee to the closest Tokyu Hands and get your paws on some Natamame toothpaste! It claims to smite your bad breath in four different flavors: Rose, Aloe (does aloe … Continue Reading For Charcoal-Fresh Breath…
I don’t know which is weirder, the idea that you’d want your nose to be bigger, or that you think you can “train” it into pulchritude by using one of … Continue Reading Nose Training
Who knew that aluminum could be the key to that holy grail of pulchritude, the small face? Apparently, it has become the flavor of the month when it comes to head … Continue Reading The Newest Ways To Get A Small Face
In Japan, guys can’t just strap on their pelt of chest hair and drag a woman back to their cave. From the pages of Men’s Knuckle magazine: how to get … Continue Reading Japanese Date Prep Bible…For Men
I’ve always wondered, how do ordinary 100% Japanese women get that round-eyed babydoll look? Fortunately, Ageha magazine hired a pro makeup artist to spill all the secrets! Here’s where she … Continue Reading Doll Eyes
No matter how unlucky you were when they were handing out the bodacious ta-tas, in less than five minutes – without any miracle creams, thighmasters-for-the-boobs, or push-up bras – you … Continue Reading Instaboobs
What’s a girl to do when her fiancé has nails that will certainly siphon off all kinds of attention that should rightly belong to the bride on her big day? … Continue Reading Bride Of Scissorhands
These days in Tokyo, the only people with black hair are those whose hair is actually gray, and the only people with gray hair are those whose hair is naturally … Continue Reading Today’s Beauty Quiz: Are You Young Enough To Have Gray Hair?
Hey, I was visiting the Togenuki Jizo and I got you a present. Wow, thanks. What is it? Guess. Oh no. On second thought, I don’t want it. It’s something … Continue Reading What’s Long & Skinny And Not What You Think It Is?
That’s right, these little beauties are SELF-PIERCERS! How many ways can I say OW?! And even though the “birthstone” earring included suggests they are for 13-year-old girls, the store that … Continue Reading Hmm, Today I Think I’ll Do A Little Body Piercing…
Wait, eww, what are those fish doing? They’re, uh, giving me a pedicure. What? A pedicure? Haha, yeah, right, they’re fluttering around beautifying your feet? With their little fishie nail … Continue Reading Weirdest. Beauty. Treatment. Ever.
Making your nose look bigger is not at the top of most Westerners’ must-have beauty techniques, but stylish Japanese blades are apparently keen on giving their schnozzes a lift! From … Continue Reading How To Get Yourself A Tall Nose
Leave it to my favorite Japanese magazine Men’s Knuckle to do a down & dirty product comparison, so guys don’t have to guess wrong when faced with the bewildering number … Continue Reading Eyelid Glue Fight To The Death!
Nothing will provoke lively dinner conversation more than returning to the familial nest for the New Year’s holidays with…red eyes! Or if goat/alien is more your style: yellow! Of course, … Continue Reading I’ve Always Wanted Red Eyes!
Unibrow isn’t a big problem here in Japan, but what’s an “herbivore man” to do when the furry bits above his eyes aren’t up to the esthé standard of his … Continue Reading Beauty Help For Men
I guess it was inevitable: the species of Japanese males who have come to be known as “grass-eating men” (sōshoku danshi) now have their own beauty brand: VegeBoy! Guys who … Continue Reading Veggie Boys vs. Carnivore Men
Congratulating yourself that your spanking new nail art will definitely make it impossible for you to be selected to wash dishes or chop vegetables, you whip out your smartphone to … Continue Reading Tools For The Fingernail Challenged
Wow, which one do I dread trying the most? It’s so hard to choose! As much as having my face covered in the kind of pond scum I remember eww-ing … Continue Reading Nightmare Or Skin Treatment? You Decide!
It looks like Coke Zero. It tastes like Coke Zero. But it has FEWER CALORIES than Coke Zero. And how is this miracle of math performed? Apparently, Mets Cola is specially … Continue Reading Less-Than-Zero Cola
Forget that zumba class – I’m going shopping instead! Every step on the way to the floor where they sell the Infrared Pants Of Titanium at Tokyu Hands now informs … Continue Reading Stairway to Svelteness Heaven
Our hapless hero starts his day by shaving his manly beard. “Ah, another day of work. Today I’m really going to kick some butt!” He gets to the office and … Continue Reading Men: Kiss That Body Fur Goodbye
How’s this for an idea: deco on everything BUT your nails! Saw this sign advertising a salon in Ebisu. • Read a novel set in Tokyo…
You know you want these! You’ll merely have to hold up one hand to get out of dishwashing and other odious chores. In a boggling bow to sheer impracticality, the contestants … Continue Reading The Edward Scissorhands School of Nail Art
If you’re going to be a visual kei star, you’ve got to get The Look. Hair bleached, waxed, teased and sprayed? Check! Matching band promo Hello Kitty X Peace Now t-shirts? … Continue Reading Anime Eyes
Okay, before you step into that steaming pile of sexist doo-doo, why not? Why shouldn’t men be able to cover up that unfortunate red thing between their eyes, or disguise … Continue Reading Makeup for Men: Hell Yeah!
Nail art: not just for girls anymore! Apparently, this competition was mostly about who could turn their male models’ hands into paragons of nail buffitude, but then there are the…thumbs. The … Continue Reading Thumbnail Art for Men
It’s a good thing voice recognition has been perfected, in case you need to do any keyboarding after installing your new Yoshiki tribute nails. This month, Kera magazine’s how-to pages … Continue Reading Tribute Nails
Forget the Clearasil and dumpster the Oil of Olay. My friend Hiro tells me that all I have to do to have beautiful skin is eat lots of motsunabe. Apparently, … Continue Reading Time For a Nice Bowl of Intestine Soup
I’ve always wondered how to use eyelid glue. I knew it was a prime tool in the make-up kits of Japanese gyaru seeking that perfect babydoll look, but never understood … Continue Reading How to Glue Your Eyelids
My all-time favorite magazine Men’s Knuckle sent an intrepid team of stylists to Kabuki-chō to perform makeovers on young men they thought could use some help achieving that irresistible host … Continue Reading Look Like a Host In One Easy Makeover!
