Japanese Date Prep Bible…For Men

BeautyRoutine

In Japan, guys can’t just strap on their pelt of chest hair and drag a woman back to their cave. From the pages of Men’s Knuckle magazine: how to get ready for a date in eleven painstaking steps, as recommended by their hostly expert!

1: Take a shower (okay, DUH.)

2: Shave your legs. Yeah, men, we’re talkin’ to YOU. And while you’re at it, de-fur all other visible body parts too.

3: Exfoliate your lips

4: Lotion up your finger webs

5: Peel at least one layer of skin off your feet

6: Manicure your nails, extra points for polish

7: Fumigate those pits

8: Check for belly fat and make farting noises with your armpit. Okay, not really. The Host With The Most recommends using mysterious roller devices to give yourself a relaxing massage.

9: Freshen up your breath with no fewer than five minty products.

10: Any skin not yet pomaded, do it now.

11: Nix the Axe and dab a little Eros Platinum on your pulse points to drive the girls wild.

Now don your pointy shoes, shiny suit and makeup, and get out there and swing the bat!

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
 The Last Tea Bowl Thief was chosen as an Editor’s Pick for Best Mystery, Thriller & Suspense on Amazon

For three hundred years, a missing tea bowl passes from one fortune-seeker to the next, changing the lives of all who possess it…read more

“A fascinating mix of history and mystery.” —Booklist

Jonelle Patrick writes novels set in Japan, produces the monthly e-magazine Japanagram, and blogs at Only In Japan and The Tokyo Guide I Wish I’d Had

Published by Jonelle Patrick

Writes all the Japan things.

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