Scary Santa
You know how some kids are afraid to go sit on Santa’s lap, even if they really really really want a pony? Well, I bet all the Santa phobias in the known world can be traced back to an early childhood experience with someone like THIS. What was the package designer thinking, casting a mass murderer as the model for this product? This Santa definitely looks like the type who would leave raw meat in your stocking, even if you’d been good all year.
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“The brilliance of this novel sneaks up on you as the pieces of its puzzle come together.” —Mac Salman, Tokyo Authority
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The Last Tea Bowl Thief was chosen as an Editor’s Pick for Best Mystery, Thriller & Suspense on Amazon!
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Jonelle Patrick writes novels set in Japan, produces the monthly newsletter Japanagram, and blogs at Only In Japan and The Tokyo Guide I Wish I’d Had
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Jonelle Patrick View All
Writing mystery books set in Tokyo is mostly what I do, but I also blog about the odd stuff I see every day in Japan. I'm a graduate of Stanford University and the Sendagaya Japanese Institute in Tokyo, and a member of the International Thriller Writers, the Mystery Writers of America, and Sisters In Crime. When I'm not in Tokyo, I live in San Francisco. I also host a travel site called The Tokyo Guide I Wish I'd Had, so if you're headed to Japan and want to check out the places I take my friends when they're in town, take a look!
Jonelle Patrick's Only In Japan 
I imagine some poor gaijin who responded to a modeling ad and was thrilled he got the gig even though he never considered himself especially good looking. And then he figured out what he would be modeling, but hey, it’s in Japan and who would ever see it anyway…
Haha, I bet you’re spot on! In fact, see how he’s trying to smile for the camera beneath the beard? Sure sign he has more experience posing in family Christmas pictures than as Jack The Ripper Claus…
Exactly. To me he looks like a nice kid who happens to be the quintessential non-Santa type.
But somehow turned into a scary character by that weird beard!
It’s the teeth that get me.
Yeah, somehow the teeth framed by the beard is a very unfortunate combo.
There’s this story in college I had to read and I think it was called 6 to 8 black men. Your probably thinking what this has to do with Santa? Lol well it was a story of how the Dutch viewed the Santa story so instead of having elves he would have 6 to 8 black men come with him. Can’t remember the whole story but I think Santa and them beat up the kids if they were bad and broke down the door or something weird like that. Made me think of that when I saw this creepy Santa.
I have never heard of that! LOLZILLA!
Here’s a link for the story.
http://www.channels.nl/knowledge/28970.html
Oh, hilarious! I David Sedaris! Thank you for posting that – I hadn’t read it before!