Tag Archives: strange Japanese flavor

Why is there corn on my…

Japan isn’t a land where it’s understood what an abomination it is to eat corn if it’s a) not the cob, b) dripping with butter, and c) being served any time of year that’s not summer. In fact, the question that arises every single time I enter a Japanese supermarket or convenience store is… WHYContinueContinue reading “Why is there corn on my…”

Tube food

A wander through any grocery store in Japan will quickly persuade you that putting something in a tube shouldn’t be confined to toothpaste, hand cream, and athlete’s foot cures. Plenty of foods are best served squeezed! If you subscribe to Japanagram (my free deeper dive into all things only-in-Japan), you’ll already have drooled over theContinueContinue reading “Tube food”

Donuts filled with crazy Japanese flavors

Japan is obviously not the birthplace of fried dough, but like so many “foreign” foods that make their way to these shores, the J-take on donuts is both foreign and completely Japanese at the very same time. And these cream-filled beauties from Abebe Bakery’s Tokyo outpost come through not just one alien land, but two,ContinueContinue reading “Donuts filled with crazy Japanese flavors”

I did not expect what’s beneath this strangely huge pop top…

Lemon Sours are the most classic of the fruity canned cocktails most Japanese have less-than-fond teenage memories of overindulging in, so I didn’t expect innovation to strike at the very training wheels of alcohol prowess. What stopped me at the splashy grocery store display wasn’t the snappy new package design, it was the weirdly hugeContinueContinue reading “I did not expect what’s beneath this strangely huge pop top…”

Taste Test: Japanese No-Alcohol Beer Smackdown

It’s been a few years since I did a taste test on Japanese no-alcohol beers, and now that so many people are opting to get buff instead of blotto, I thought it might be time for a rematch! Last time, they were more like the food stand-ins that stylists use for photo shoots: looks likeContinueContinue reading “Taste Test: Japanese No-Alcohol Beer Smackdown”

Alt Cherry

This spring has been hella cold and rainy, so not only did the cherry blossoms bloom a week late, everyone’s selfies in front of the pinkness feature brave smiles hunched in Seattle-worthy raingear. Which is why we need to be cheered by the pink pleasures of hanami season that don’t give a fig for theContinueContinue reading “Alt Cherry”

Weird Japanese burger sighting: The Big Mac (and Cheese)!

It’s been a while since I spotted a Japanese burger worthy of sharing, but even I had to stop and laugh when I saw THIS: And lest you be tempted to give it points for at least being plant-based, there really is a big old burger o’ beef beating at the heart of that cheesyContinueContinue reading “Weird Japanese burger sighting: The Big Mac (and Cheese)!”

Japan’s most iconic sweets, but make them Italian

What fresh hell is this international mash-up? The most iconic Japanese sweets stuffed with cherry tomatoes and basil? Next they’ll be trying to sell us tomato-basil flavored donuts… • If you could use more weird food combinations in your life… •

Craft…Cola?

In the category of “things that should not have a ‘handcrafted’ version,” cola has got to be the headliner. This inexplicable cola concentrate was on sale at my local organic food boutique (file under “WUT?”), and the explanation on the back assures me that not only was it made from “spices procured from all overContinueContinue reading “Craft…Cola?”

This Does Not Make Me Want To Eat That Cheesecake

From the Tokyo bakery that has been indicted for misusing the Universal Garnish on previous occasions comes this inexplicable frippery. I had to press my nose right up against the glass to figure out that this cheesecake is decorated with… …shriveled grapes and pine needles? •

Guess that flavor, J-style

Most Japanese people hate the taste of root beer (WHY?) so if it’s a hella hot day in Tokyo and you’re craving a root beer float, a soda topped with soft serve (and blasphemously adulterated with ice cubes) is about as close as you’re going to get. But how close is it? Well… The blueContinueContinue reading “Guess that flavor, J-style”

Crispy Intestine Snacks

Despite the fact that this new snack is called “Addictive Intestines,” I’m afraid you won’t find me bingeing a bucket ‘o crispy innards while Netflixing my way through a Saturday night, even though they boast not just one, but two kinds of squicky bits. They do make it easy to pick through the mix forContinueContinue reading “Crispy Intestine Snacks”

Soft Drink Flavors I Do Not Want To Try

In the scraping-the-bottom-of-the-flavor-idea-barrel sweepstakes, a clear winner. As if banana-flavored soda isn’t nauseating enough, they paired it with that nasty sour-milk yogurt flavor for good measure This yogurt-banana mash-up surfs in on the enduring popularity of the local favorite soft drink, Calpis, which inexplicably established sweetened sour milk as a delightful flavor in Japan. InContinueContinue reading “Soft Drink Flavors I Do Not Want To Try”

Spot The Elvis

If you’re looking for a country with absolutely zero junk food guilt, you found it. Behold the bagel sandwiches available at this shop I spotted while walking through Azabu Juban last week. Yes, in addition to the Elvis (#15: peanut butter/bacon/banana) they also offer The Rainbow Colored (#20), which features a multi-colored bagel filled withContinueContinue reading “Spot The Elvis”

Please Tell Me That’s Not Seaweed On My Ice Cream

The sticky rice balls I can handle. I could even get into the slightly gelatinous, traditional mitarashi topping that gets its brown from, uh, soy sauce. But I draw the line at nori. Yes, those suspicious-looking little black things on top are KILL ME NOW strips of the same kind of seaweed that holds your tuna roll together. AndContinueContinue reading “Please Tell Me That’s Not Seaweed On My Ice Cream”

The Slippery Slope, Illustrated

See, this is where tolerance will get you. Let them get away with putting ginger pickles and fish shavings on pizza, say nothing when your spaghetti comes topped with sea urchin eggs, and next thing you know, you’ll be waking up to every child’s worst nightmare: SPINACH PANCAKES. Let’s zoom in on that serving suggestion for aContinueContinue reading “The Slippery Slope, Illustrated”

Twice The Guilt, Half The Pleasure

What’s wrong with this picture? Okay, I totally get that some days it’s hard to choose between a bucket of french fries and a bathtub of ice cream. I even understand that some days you just say FML, I’m having BOTH. But this? No. Just…no. •

It Must Be Fake Peach Flavor Season Again

The vending machines are suddenly stuffed with pink drinks. Of course, there hasn’t been a genuine fuzzy-skinned stone fruit within a thousand kilometers of these so-called “peach” libations, but that doesn’t stop them from making the point that even drinks flavored with highly unnatural chemicals must only appear when they’re “in season” in Japan. •

What’s Purple And Squishy And Tastes Like Thanksgiving?

This time of year, if it’s sweet and purple, it tastes like…WAT? Yes, sweet potato candy (and muffins and ice cream) is a THING, and anything that’s purple in Japan right now tastes kind of like Thanksgiving without the marshmallows. Let’s sidestep the impossible task of pondering why anyone would make desserts that taste like sweet potatoesContinueContinue reading “What’s Purple And Squishy And Tastes Like Thanksgiving?”

The Triple-Decker Noodle Burger

Just when you thought America had cornered the market when it came to eating ALL the carbs, Japanese burger chain Loteria one-ups the red-white-‘n-blue with this tri-deck noodle monster. Yes, it’s that carbo-load favorite, noodles on a bun. Times three. Enjoy. •

Spicy Tomato Filled Doughnuts?

Aieeeee, when I saw this on the menu at Krispy Kreme, I knew I’d have to strap on my Try Anything Once Cojones and take one for the team! My first clue this wasn’t a regular doughnut was that funny little pesto-tomato hat on top. Inside was, basically, a sort of sweet pizza sauce. IContinueContinue reading “Spicy Tomato Filled Doughnuts?”

Yes, Even The Cheese Is Black

I finally tried Burger King Japan’s most recent all-black, all-the-time burger offering, and OMG please don’t look now, but I wolfed it down in record time. It looks pretty weird (especially the BLACK CHEESE) but the taste was I-think-I’d-better-have-another-in-the-interest-of-science good. “Shalyapin Sauce”? Apparently it’s named after a Russian opera singer who had a toothache when he toured Japan, soContinueContinue reading “Yes, Even The Cheese Is Black”

Chocolate, Strawberry and…Bean Powder?

Okay, buckaroos, it’s time to play Guess That Flavor with these cones of soft-serve goodness I spotted recently in Asakusa! Our first contestants are the lovely blue ice cream on the left, and the tasty-looking coffee-colored one on the right. (Wily contestants will recognize that’s a hint it definitely doesn’t taste like a cup o’ Joe!) Next up, that delightfully vanilla-ish-lookingContinueContinue reading “Chocolate, Strawberry and…Bean Powder?”

When I Said I Wanted Cheese Pizza, I Didn’t Mean THAT Kind Of Cheese!

I thought I’d seen the pinnacle of Unclear On The Concept when wedges of Camembert started showing up on Japanese pizza, but that was before I spotted this one topped with, yes, blue cheese. Mmm, mmm, little veins of smelly melted moldy bits, paired with tomatoes and that perennial Italian favorite, broccoli. •

Veggie Ice Cream?!

From the land of snacks with tentacles and fish bone crackers comes the latest healthy food disguised as a snack: carrot and tomato ice cream! Haagen-Dazs Japan hit the subways with a “secret” poster campaign this month, introducing the latest way for even the most dedicated junk food addict to get some stealth vegetables. The carrot one is mixed withContinueContinue reading “Veggie Ice Cream?!”

Blue Caffe Latte

Coffee + Milk + BLUE CURACAO? With a LIME on top? I’m still gathering the courage to try the latest entry in this season’s unlikely flavor-combo coffee drinks of Tokyo – partly because I’m frightened of any food that’s BLUE, but also am deeply suspicious of anything I have to google to find out what flavor it is.ContinueContinue reading “Blue Caffe Latte”

Cinnamon Roll Blasphemy

In the next round of trade talks with Japan, go ahead and give away the store when it comes to cars, beef and rice, but we need to make one thing perfectly clear: Things That Look Like Cinnamon Rolls Should Not Be Filled With Red Beans And Topped With Green Tea Frosting. •

World’s Worst Popsicle

If spaghetti-flavored ice on a stick isn’t the world’s worst idea for a snack, I don’t know what is. But, in an act of supreme self-sacrifice, I tried it, so you don’t have to! Supposedly, the “Napolitan Rich” Gari-Gari contains pockets of tomato jelly, but I was unable to detect them in the short time the instantly-regretted biteContinueContinue reading “World’s Worst Popsicle”

Salty Dragonblood Toothpaste

But what I want to know is, how do they KNOW the dragons only ate pesticide-free virgins? Is the blood harvested from organically-certified, knight-armor-free, farm-grown dragons? You can get your very own Toothpaste Of Targaryens at the Tokyu Hands store in Ikebukuro. •

So, What DO Cherry Blossoms Taste Like?

Around cherry blossom season in Japan, the shelves suddenly fill with “sakura”-flavored food. But what does cherry blossom-flavored food actually taste like? I investigate. Cherry blossoms taste like…mini-shrimp potato chips. Cherry blossoms taste like…plum-flavored whisky & soda. Cherry blossoms taste like…pinkish berry combo gel and vanilla ice cream. Cherry blossoms taste like…potato chips sprinkled with groundContinueContinue reading “So, What DO Cherry Blossoms Taste Like?”

Cherry Blossom Flavored Ice Cream

Naturally, it being the Pink Season, all things must be as one with the almighty sakura. Including…ice cream. And what does this marvel of food engineering taste like? Hmm, good question.  Fortunately, they did not try to reproduce the taste of traditional Japanese sakura sweets, which are sweet rice cakes jarringly wrapped in salty pickled cherry leaves. Usually I’mContinueContinue reading “Cherry Blossom Flavored Ice Cream”

For Charcoal-Fresh Breath…

…get thee to the closest Tokyu Hands and get your paws on some Natamame toothpaste! It claims to smite your bad breath in four different flavors: Rose, Aloe (does aloe have a flavor?), Persimmon and Bamboo Charcoal. Yes, the black kind. Even stranger, guess what this toothpaste is made from? Sword beans! Bad breath, IContinueContinue reading “For Charcoal-Fresh Breath…”

Traditional KFC Christmas Dinner, Now With Seaweed!

Lines stretch around the block at every KFC in Tokyo on Christmas Eve, as household minions are dispatched to pick up the traditional holiday fare, but this year they have a choice between regular and seaweed flavor. Pass the biscuits and tofu, ma! • And if you’re looking for some fine escapist reading to curl upContinueContinue reading “Traditional KFC Christmas Dinner, Now With Seaweed!”

31 Flavors Of…Toothpaste?

Yes, this one tastes like Indian Curry! Now you can fight cavities and have curry-fresh breath too, with this new line of Breath Palette flavored toothpaste! With thirty-one strange flavors to choose from, your teeth can sparkle with a different one each day for a month. Get yourself some righteous morning coffee breath with CaféContinueContinue reading “31 Flavors Of…Toothpaste?”

What’s Wrong With These Desserts…?

Luscious strawberries…succulent peaches…flaky pastry…fresh whipped cream…all topped off with…PARSLEY. Yes, the fluffy little herb that rocked the 1950s sits inexplicably atop this otherwise tasty-looking fruit tart, and the strangest thing is, this wasn’t a random garnish fail. How about a big bite of Mont Blanc desert-itude featuring candied chestnuts, chocolate, custard, cream…and PARSLEY? Or banana-cream-caramelContinueContinue reading “What’s Wrong With These Desserts…?”

Squicky Cow Parts Chowdown

Hey, are you ready to grill up some tasty fourth stomach of cow tonight? Or maybe you’d prefer first stomach? Let’s get one of each, to compare! Then for chasers, how about a nice plate of diaphragm? And…let’s see…it’s always so hard to decide between large intestine and small, especially when there are three kinds ofContinueContinue reading “Squicky Cow Parts Chowdown”

It Looks Like a Burrito. It Says It’s a Burrito. But…

Okay, even though it claims in English to be a HOT & DELICIOUS BURRITO, I should have known that anything resembling a slightly overgrown packet of saltine crackers was going to deliver nothing but disappointment. But in case I had any doubts, it says right there on the package in Japanese: Bolognese & cheese. Unclear-on-the-nationalityContinueContinue reading “It Looks Like a Burrito. It Says It’s a Burrito. But…”

Cooking With Junk Food

From the test kitchens of intrepid single guys come these taste treats, made solely from junk food obtainable at any corner convenience store! Let’s accompany the judges as they determine just what combos deliver a flavor bomb that has nothing to do with the ingredients! ••• Sticky Fermented Soybeans + Vanilla Ice Cream = TurkishContinueContinue reading “Cooking With Junk Food”

Salad Pizza

Now that we’re deep into the dog days of summer, doesn’t the very idea of nomming down a hot slice heaped with stomach-bombing meats kind of make you shudder? Enter…the Salad Pizza! Sure to please the ever-dieting bikini wearers as well as the lone vegetarian throwing a wrench into the Friday night beer fest, thisContinueContinue reading “Salad Pizza”

Please Tell Me That’s Not Banana Coffee

Oh noooo! It is! Chocolate banana coffee, to be exact, and it’s this month’s special at the Excelsior Cafe. In my humble opinion, those two flavors go together like mushrooms and whipped cream, but that’s not the worst part. The feature that really pushes this one into the category of foods you would only serveContinueContinue reading “Please Tell Me That’s Not Banana Coffee”

Coffee + Beer. No. Just…no.

Yes, it’s COFFEE BEER! If anyone ever said to me, “Wow, you two go together like coffee and beer!” I think I’d start dusting off my OK Cupid profile. And it doesn’t stop there. This ad suggests other unlikely combos as well. Pineapple juice beer! Lychee beer! Grapefruit beer! And apparently it’s key to serveContinueContinue reading “Coffee + Beer. No. Just…no.”

Would You Like Fries On That?

Your eyes do not deceive you: right there between the mustardy-mayo and the all-beef patty is a honkin’ deep-fried swadge of hash browns. In an attempt to challenge the Gurakoro for carb supremacy, this Idaho Burger sneaks in the equivalent of a side of fries, in addition to the side of fries. And see howContinueContinue reading “Would You Like Fries On That?”

The Carb-O-Load Burger

…and just so no addictive starchy food group is left out, it come with fries! Hey, what happens if you slap everybody’s favorite carb-o-rific side dishes together and sandwich them between an additionally carbo-o-loaded bun? Macaroni & cheese + shrimp croquette = McDonald’s Japan’s new Gurakoro Burger! The name comes from smushing together the words “gratin” (hereContinueContinue reading “The Carb-O-Load Burger”

Cabbage and Ginger Pickle Pizza

What’s round and topped with cabbage, ginger pickles, bean sprouts, mayonnaise, otafuku sauce and dried fish shavings? Okonomiyaki pizza, of course! The beloved Osaka “omelet” is traditionally made with an eggy batter that includes shredded slimy yams, but Shakeys gives it a Western-style twist by piling all the ingredients onto a pizza crust instead. Pass theContinueContinue reading “Cabbage and Ginger Pickle Pizza”

What’s Green and Crunchy and Not The Flavor You Think It Is?

Okay, I know it’s not green tea. I’m not even going to waste a guess saying it might be green tea. Wait, why? Because in Japan most cookies and cakes and other things that ought not ever to be green (except on St.  Patrick’s day) are green tea flavor. I’m not saying it’s right, butContinueContinue reading “What’s Green and Crunchy and Not The Flavor You Think It Is?”

And Today’s Japanese Pizza Mystery Ingredient Is…?

Blue Cheese? blaaat. Camembert? blaaat. Gouda? blaaat. Maple Syrup? BING-BONG! Yes, this month, Domino’s Japan will ship you a pizza bursting with four cheeses never before melted together on a crust, and some of Quebec’s finest pancake condiment to pour over the top! A taste treat to…remember. •

Mmm, Intestine Flavored Noodles

Standing in line this morning to buy food so I could make it through my three-hour Japanese class, I was casually browsing the shelves next to me in case something looked better than the melon bread in my hot little hand. At that hour of the morning, I’m usually still too brain dead to beContinueContinue reading “Mmm, Intestine Flavored Noodles”

Spaghetti Burger

Yesterday afternoon I was running around my neighborhood without lunch and too many errands to do, and suddenly I turned into a teenage boy. MUST. EAT. ONE MILLION CALORIES. NOW. Fortunately, the ever-handy MosBurger was close enough to stumble into, but as I was making for the finish line, I was brought to a screechingContinueContinue reading “Spaghetti Burger”