What kind of woman pays a guy to spend time with her? The truth might surprise you – it’s not women who are too unattractive to get near a guy otherwise. Actually, about seventy percent of women who go to host clubs work in the mizu shōbai business themselves (in hostess clubs or places that provide other kinds of entertainment for men). For one thing, they can afford it, since a successful hostess can make as much money as a successful host. And after a long night of making the men they’re entertaining feel like they’re God’s Gift To Women (even if they’re just a spotty assistant car dealer from rural Aomori), it’s not surprising that hostesses want to relax and get some of the same treatment themselves.
And around thirty percent are just regular women of all kinds. Office ladies. Woman execs who work long hours. Single women who are too busy to have a boyfriend (or choose not to for various reasons). Married women whose husbands work all the time. Girls who just want to feel like they’re out on a date, even though they don’t have a boyfriend.
So, do you have to sneak around to do it? The answer is no, it’s not shameful to go to a host club (not like a guy being caught coming out of a strip joint) but it’s not the kind of thing you’d probably mention to your boss or your grandmother. And if you don’t have money, you can get into trouble, fast. A host club habit can cost thousands of dollars a week, if you’re a regular. Going to a host club isn’t shameful, but getting into debt is. So you have to be careful it doesn’t become a habit you can’t afford.
Fallen Angel readers often ask me what it’s really like to go to a host club. If you’re curious too, here are answers to the TOP TEN QUESTIONS ABOUT HOST CLUBS:
Why do women go to host clubs?
What kind of women go to host clubs?
What’s it like to visit a host club?
How expensive is it to go to a host club?
What is a host club “champagne call”?
Can foreigners get into a host club?
How do I find a good host club?
Why do hosts dress like that? Everything you always wanted to know about host fashion.
A Day In The Life: What’s it like to be a host?
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Jonelle Patrick writes novels set in Japan, produces the monthly e-magazine Japanagram, and blogs at Only In Japan and The Tokyo Guide I Wish I’d Had
Only In Japan 
I’d like to go there and become a host. I’m 30.. latin and speak perfect english and obviously spanish. I think it may be something Asian girls may find attractive since not that many latins go there to become hosts. Any leads as to how can I achieve this?
I’m sure you would be very popular! There are only two things standing in your way: a working visa and at least conversational intermediate-level Japanese.
You wouldn’t have to speak perfect Japanese, but you’d have to be able to carry on a conversation with non-English/Spanish speaking customers. And you’d have to speak well enough to use the polite forms toward the host club manager, or you can’t be hired and trained. (People who speak anything but Japanese are few and far between in the host world.)
The visa problem is a little harder – host clubs aren’t the kind of businesses that sponsor visas, so you’d have to get a longterm visa some other way. The easiest ways are to get either a student visa or work for an English teaching company. The problem with student visas is that you are allowed to work at anything EXCEPT being a host/hostess and doing door-to-door sales. If you go to work for an English school that sponsors visas, you’ll have to work full time at the company, then moonlight as a host at night.
But good luck! I think it would be a great experience, and I hope you make it to Japan!
Hello Jonelle (if I may ?) I am taking the liberty of reaching out to you as I have a bit of an odd request (I am not sure how to get in touch so I have written to you both on Facebook and on here). My name is Emilie I am 23 years old and I study Cultural Anthropology in Germany. I am currently preparing my fieldwork for March 2024 which I plan to do in Tokyo. I have read all your articles on Host Clubs and realised you are one of the few authors who has written about it in such thorough detail.
In my own research I had previously worked on the male gaze in Japan and I now wish to study the female gaze and how Japanese women fantasise or imagine men. I figured that Host Clubs would be the perfect Case Study as they are catered to women and their desires (naturally they are other places as well such as butlers cafe etc…).
However I am struggling with finding potential informants. I cannot travel to Japan until next year and since I will only be there for a short period of time (during my semester break). I was hoping I could find some women to speak and build a rapport with beforehand. Thus, I wanted to ask you if you have any advice on how I may find some informants remotely. I am looking for women of all ages and social backgrounds who have or who are frequenting Host Clubs. Perhaps if you know women in your circle who would be willing to talk to me. I hope I am not overstepping with this request but I would greatly appreciate all the help I can get.
Thank you in advance
Kind Regards
Emilie Bellon
Hi Emilie! What a fascinating area of research! I can see that we share many interests, and I wish you lived over my back fence so we could have a long coffee together. Will your study be published anywhere I might read it when you’re done?
Sadly, even I had trouble finding women to introduce me into the host club world, because over 70% of those who frequent host clubs work in mizu shoubai themselves and they belong to a strata of society to which ordinary women have no access to. I finally got my introduction through a friend who played on a touch football team with a host club manager, but like me, she has moved on in the years since I was regularly writing about host clubs.
Might I suggest an alternative, though, regarding the Japanese female gaze? It’s mostly cosplayers and women who come from the same background as hosts who embrace the paid butler/host fantasy, but several years ago there was a mass movement among ordinary Japanese women (right up through middle age) who switched from being fans of J-pop to K-pop, and started watching K-dramas instead of J-dramas. There was a huge boom in three-day trips to Korea (not just for concerts) and suddenly every Japanese male drama star was required to cry and/or hug someone at least once in every drama (awkwardly, I might add). I think the reasons for this mass switch give some interesting insights into the Japanese female gaze—perhaps even more so than the sliver of the population that adores big hair and shiny suits—and getting introductions to ordinary women who are starry-eyed over Korean actors and pop stars (or the Japanese ones trying to copy them) ought to be much easier than finding women who spend their money at host clubs.
Wishing you great good luck with your research, and do keep me in the loop if you publish somewhere when you’re done!
Thank you Jonelle for your reply. I apologise for taking over a week to get back to you I thought I had replied only to notice that it was still in my drafts.
I understand that having access to Host Clubs can be very challenging for a number of reasons. I was very excited about this project at first until I understood that I would need a lot more time and experience in order to carry it out and it might not be the most relevant lens through which to study the female gaze anymore. Finding informants willing to share their experience has proven itself to be nearly impossible (at least not remotely). I have started looking into butler cafes or other spaces that include role play and flirting with the female customers. However, you have also lifted a very relevant point about the K-dramas and K-pop becoming increasingly influential and shaping the female gaze. I would argue that a very polished almost androgynous appearance still seems to be favoured. I think in order to conduct research efficiently I also need to determine the population that I will be looking at. A classmate also suggested that I look into Fujoshis which could be interesting. Thank you for sharing your own research I find that Host clubs have a significant anthropological relevance.
I will continue to follow your work closely and will gladly update you if my paper is published
Kind Regards
Emilie
I hope you have more luck with the butler cafe angle! I did think of another route you might pursue that could provide insights into the same female gaze that finds hosts irresistible—are you familiar with visual kei bands? These Japanese heavy metal glam rock groups affect a look that is indistinguishable from hosts. (Do a Google image search for “visual kei band” and you’ll see what I mean!) A lot of “host prince” fashions are inspired by these musicians—big hair, androgynous beauty, slick, tight clothing mixed with silver jewelry and metal studs— and if what you’re looking for is “What do Japanese women find attractive in men who dress and act like hosts?” it’s a pretty parallel group. Visual kei fans are more accessible than host club patrons because all you have to do is go to a concert to meet them. Just like at host clubs, they tend to idolize and fantasize about not just the band, but one member in particular. The big visual kei acts fill giant stadiums, but the up-and-coming bands play live houses like the Liquid Room in Tokyo, where everything is SRO and it’s not hard to strike up conversations with other fans, before and after the set (in Japanese—still not much English spoken in this population). If you’re really lucky, there may even be crossover with the host club world—I once spent a couple of hours after a concert talking with a fan who worked as a host in an all-female club where women pretend to be male hosts for a female clientele!
You might also seek out the shops where hosts buy their clothes. There are certain brand names and stores that cater specifically to hosts (with prices to match!) if you’re interested in seeing the latest “look” that appeals to the female gaze they aim to attract. Before the pandemic, the Shibuya Magnet store used to be home to Vanquish, Black Flame, Vice Fairy, etc., but they’ve since moved to boutiques elsewhere in Tokyo. The women who go to host clubs don’t shop there, but I’m pretty sure some of the salesmen are moonlighting hosts or ex-hosts. If your Japanese is good enough (and you manage to look like a potential customer, not a researcher!) they might offer to introduce you to a club. Remember: the host club business model is to snag repeat customers, not one-offs (especially one-offs who might write unflattering things about them) so if you’re uncomfortable with the ethics of not telling them why you’re really interested, you’d probably be wasting your time with this.
I do hope you find a way into some of these subcultures, because I’d very much like to read what a serious researcher finds! Good luck, and I’d love to hear about what you find out, and help if I can.
Best always, Jonelle
Thank you Jonelle for taking the time to share your reflections with me, I really appreciate it. I am indeed familiar with Visual Kei, in fact I used to follow a few bands when I was a teenager, I found their over the top appearance memorable. However I never really made the connection between Glam rock bands and Host Clubs but you are right there is definitely this shared idea of catering to female fans and creating a fantasy, which is what I am most interested in.
The clubs that you have mentioned in which women dress up as male hosts, could they be Onabe clubs by any chance ? Would it be easier to access them or is it comparable to traditional Host Clubs ?
I had read on a few forums that Host Clubs usually do not welcome tourists or foreigners as it is likely that they will not come back and they are trying to build a loyal clientele.
I have given up on actually being able to enter a club because I do not believe I would be able to afford the expensive alcohol and I am not sure that the women present will appreciate me interrupting their time with their favourite host for an informal interview.
I think it is a project that would require more time and preparation so I hope I will be able to do that eventually ! For now I will look into Visual Kei also 🙂
I am facing another significant challenge: I do not speak Japanese so I would have to rely on someone to translate for me. I am currently trying to look for an interpreter.
I will gladly share the results of my research with you ! Thank you again for taking the time to reply !
Kind Regards
Emilie