Modern Day Tweets From The Pillow Book

If Sei Shonagōn were alive and well and living in Tokyo…

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@seishonagon A latecomer pushes in front of you at a festival and holds up his huge iPad to take pictures #hatefulthings

@seishonagon Someone wearing a bright orange jacket is standing around texting on his phone, smack in the middle of a famous cherry blossom view #hatefulthings

@seishonagon You step off the train to let other people leave, and another passenger slides into your spot next to the door #hatefulthings

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@seishonagon The remnants of latte art in the bottom of a cup #thingsthathavelosttheirpower

@seishonagon A free ticket for a museum exhibit that’s already over #thingsthathavelosttheirpower

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@seishonagon It’s finally your turn to toss your coin at the shrine, but it bounces off the slats of the offering box and rolls away #embarrassingthings

@seishonagon A small child waiting for the light to change watches you dash across the street while it’s still red #embarrassingthings

@seishonagon A visiting friend takes your advice to go see your favorite museum, but it’s the day after a national holiday and it’s closed #embarrassingthings

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@seishonagon Your station zipping past when you accidentally boarded the express train #thingsthataredistantthoughnear

@seishonagon You can see that the immigration clerk is several days past her ideal roots touch-up date, but there are still fifty numbers ahead of yours #thingsthataredistantthoughnear

@seishonagon A sold-out light burns below the peach-flavored water in the vending machine #thingsthataredistantthoughnear

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@seishonagon Those pale cherry blossoms that barely look pink, even in real life #thingsthatgainbybeingphotoshopped

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@seishonagon The mildewed raincoat of the man pressed up against you in a packed train #squalidthings

@seishonagon A trampled washcloth in the crosswalk on a rainy day #squalidthings

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@seishonagon Discovering your point card is filled up, so your coffee is unexpectedly free #pleasingthings

@seishonagon A famous garden, deserted on a rainy day #pleasingthings

@seishonagon Being the first one to walk through fresh snow in the morning #pleasingthings

Detail from a portrait of Sei Shonagōn, with apologies to Mitsuoki Tosa

(And if you’re looking for ACTUAL tweets from the Pillow Book, they are here, in all their timeless glory!)

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⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Last Tea Bowl Thief was chosen as an Editor’s Pick for Best Mystery, Thriller & Suspense on Amazon

“A fascinating mix of history and mystery.” —Booklist

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Jonelle Patrick writes novels set in Japan, produces the monthly e-magazine Japanagram, and blogs at Only In Japan and The Tokyo Guide I Wish I’d Had