Tweets from the Pillow Book: Pandemic Version

If Sei Shonagon (author of that famous tenth-century snark-bible The Pillow Book) had been alive today and quarantined with the rest of us, I’m pretty sure she’d have tweeted these:

@seishonagon The flowers in full bloom at a closed park #thingsthataredistantthoughnear

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@seishonagon You finally make it to the front of the line for the supermarket, but realize you forgot your purse #thingsthataredistantthoughnear

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@seishonagon The roommate with a Switch who you should have chosen instead of the extrovert with a car #thingsthataredistantthoughnear

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@seishonagon A full package of two-ply toilet paper #pleasingthings

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@seishonagon Working from home during quarantine when your partner still works at an office #hatefulthings

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@seishonagon Social-distanced walking buddies who chat obliviously while occupying both the sidewalk AND the street #hatefulthings

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@seishonagon A disgarded rubber glove #squalidthings

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@seishonagon You missed the sign saying only one packet of chocolate chips per customer #embarrassingthings

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@seishonagon Food from a fancy restaurant doesn’t taste quite as good at the kitchen table #thingsthathavelosttheirpower

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@seishonagon The new clothes you ordered before the pandemic arrive, but now there’s nowhere to wear them #thingsthathavelosttheirpower

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⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ 
The Last Tea Bowl Thief was chosen as an Editor’s Pick for
Best Mystery, Thriller & Suspense on Amazon

“A fascinating mix of history and mystery.” —Booklist

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Jonelle Patrick writes novels set in Japan, produces the monthly e-magazine Japanagram, and blogs at Only In Japan and The Tokyo Guide I Wish I’d Had