Auto-Incinerate, For All Your Sacred Garbage Needs

ShrineMoeru

Now you no longer have to do the heavy lifting when it comes to heaving that sacred garbage into the shrine’s designated bin! Here at the Narita Fudo-san Shrine, this conveyor belt incinerator churns year-round, ready to bear away your tired old lucky charms and exhausted household gods to be cremated in the proper way. Just step up to the offering box, throw in a coin, and wave goodbye to last year’s tapped-out Safety In Traffic amulet as it’s automatically spirited away under the altar to the purifying flames beyond.

But clueless worshippers be forewarned: not only are you forbidden to send Daruma figures that didn’t deliver that 7th grade boyfriend,discarded My Little Ponies and grubby stuffies to their fiery doom, the sign to the left warns against launching anything made of veneer (toxic fumes may result), plastic (likewise), or non-burnable items like glass.

Jonelle Patrick is the author of the Only In Tokyo mystery series, published by Penguin/Intermix.