The Scourge Of The Orange Jacket

Okay, I know you think I’m a whiner because I went off on this guy wearing an orange jacket, sitting right in the middle of a shot I wanted to take during cherry blossom season at Shinjuku Gyōen. I mean, one guy, minding his own business – so what if his head’s inside his phone instead of looking around at the incredible clouds of beauteous pinkitude and noticing that other people (okay, me) might want to take a photo without HIM AND HIS ORANGE JACKET smack in the middle of it?

I’m not saying you’re not entitled to your opinion, but this orange jacket pestilence, I swear, it’s not just real, it’s everywhere!

No matter how far you travel (on an all-day bus tour to Hanamiyama in Fukushima, for example)…

…no matter what the weather (way the freakin’ freak in northiest Aomori-ken)…

…there are people wearing ORANGE JACKETS. I mean, did you even notice the thousand-year-old cherry tree in the background? Not before your attention was hijacked by those two jacketbombers in front of it, I bet

Sometimes there are whole families of them

Sometimes they travel in packs

And they obviously paid no attention to the travel advisory about confining the mayhem to cherry blossom season

You’d think the tulips at Showa Kinen Park could hold their own, but no

The real pros surf the circuit, ruining photos at Unesco World Heritage sites in the off-season

Pushers of orange jackets set up shop distressingly close to known flower-viewing sites

And tragically enough, you’re never too young to begin the training

When not ranting maniacally, Jonelle Patrick writes novels set in Tokyo

“A genuinely gripping crime thriller which wrong-foots and perplexes the reader throughout, drawing us in emotionally . . . Highly recommended.” Raven Crime Reads

Nine Years. Nine death anniversaries. Tomorrow will be the tenth. He always comes early to avoid crossing paths with her family. He always comes on the day he actually killed her…read more